flying above the commoners.. may segregate your feeling but what if the wounds you catch up with weak wings...udaan gave me confidence , hope , and a goal.. definitely the story is not of a one day revelation.. a prolonged description how a human feels his mind change.
udaan release was conducted in sports complex MANIT, bhopal. on the consent of the college authority , and students society. but still due to huge mismanagement
the show became small scale , and could only reach a few numbers, while it was supposed to go miles and miles.
as my brother sarthak said " this is what bands should be making.".
i knew that udaan was meant to hover for eternity , but what were the causes it remained silent..i cant blame any body ., after all it was my composition.
1. i cant blame my former band dfuzion.. , for being pessimistic and unsupportive for my attitude.
2. i cant blame abhijit parahar (keyist "sonneya") , for no part in udaan .
3. i cant blame scspab, for overriding and shoving the meaning of strength , power , position over my face, and forcing us to beg them , eventually making it
almost impossible for the event to occur.
4. i cant blame souvik (co- vocalist "udaan") for not supporting the video for imdu productions , and hence not being present in the press release..
5. i cant blame my former best friend Arunabh Das for the emotional torture during the high times of my life, let it be NASA (National Association of
Students in Architecture) , Saiyyan (my debut in bhopal as a composer), Maffick (MANIT's cultural fest) or any thing that ever mattered to me..
6. i definitely cant blame my self for not going to delhi for the press release , and put all the pressure over Abhinav's (Sound designer/Producer/ Sound
engineer/guitarist/vocalist/tablist of "Udaan" and "Sonneya") shoulder.
people said i had become ambitious , i was just not ready how to take it in . Some said , its a good thing , some said it will engulf you within.
My girlfriend was the only one supporting me at that time (although i dont know about now).
every time i wanted to make a song , satans blocked my way in some or the other forms.
udaan was created in the witer vacations , to be precise, 31st dec 2010, and after the new years eve , i called up my friends Abhijit and Arunabh about
my compsitions , although me and abhijit were already working on a song , (we called it D major) , . well we were barely working , because the craze of saiyyan ,
was all over us ,; made us blind, and deaf , deaf enough to recognise the frquencies of different notes.
i was really happy that i atleast have something to show to my buddies, that would have stopped people making snide comments on saiyyan being our only composition.
udaan was mislooked at for 6 whole months... i wasnt joking guys when i said i made a new composition.
after six months at the time of maffick , i left dfuzion , ( a hoax spread by somebody which ironically became the truth),. i dint leave , they kicked me out ,
or i should say , he. and despite everything , i was still emotionally attached to those so called "friends" .
it was 7th may 2011 , a lonely saturday night , i got a call from avani ( my girlfriend ) , informing me about my facebook blocked former best friend
arunabh das' approaching birthday the day after . i went into 3 minutes of retrospection and found myself in avm hostel one year back when we celebrated
arunabh's birth day in the dimly fashioned lights of room 209 with beer cans and a choco truffle cake (abhi" its my gf's bday , i want the best cake you have").
we squandered the streets of bhopal ,till 4 in the morning under the reason of leaving abhi to the station. we got chased by the police , we dodged , went to station
to have smokes, ended up puking in our senior's room and wandering in the morning ' "wat was suman das doing in there" ?, . . all those beautiful moments charged me
with a hope , . a hope that everything thats happening is something which couldnt have happened between us . and that everybody was acting , where they know
that at the end of the show , when there are no audience , they have to come back together , and shake hands , and continue with there life .
i picked up my guitar , while i already noticed the frown that was created in my roomate's face. my mind knew a way out , my heart had a purpose , and the scattered
peices of music itself combined to become something more meaningfull:
i had an idea of saying between the lines and the message would be deliver if they could read it.my life was a sin ...
the rest shall be a confession
No comments:
Post a Comment